Practice Opening Up To Your Spouse

Bringing More Honesty Into Your Relationship

Find a convenient time for your spouse and begin by expressing your love and desire for a more intimate and expressive relationship. Then share something that you would not have normally shared in the past. If your spouse is similarly motivated, LISTEN, and then explain back what you think you understand.

All Sharing Is NOT Created Equal

I am not suggesting you start telling things that will get your spouse upset. I am referring to triumphs or disappointments that you would have kept to yourself in the past; share them with your spouse, let your spouse into your life.

After all, marriage is about communication, and the more you practice communicating with each other, the easier it will become.

Share Your Life: Hopes, Dreams, Fears, and Expectations

Try to bring the conversation around to more abstract concepts when the two of you are relaxing together, without making it into an attack on your spouse. There are many things to speak about, and the more you open your inner self up to your spouse, the better you both will understand about each other.

Discuss Hopes

Discuss any hopes you have, whether for life, marriage, career, children, or whatever.

Talk About Dreams

Speak about your dreams. Where do you see yourself in a year? Five years? Ten years? This can refer to your dreams for the two of you, for your career, or for your children. You can also discuss dreams that are fantastical and will never happen, so long as you think your spouse won't hear an undercurrent of unhappiness.

Share Fears

Everyone has fears. You are more human for having them and discussing them. Talk about your fears or anxieties with your spouse. You may find that you are able to connect over them, or that you feel better for having shared them with your loved one.

Tell Expectations (Carefully)

Expectations are another great way to open up and communicate with each other. However, some expectations (like unmet expectations of your spouse) are bad and can be damaging both to have and to share. So tread carefully. Better to speak about expectations at work, and in material objects, and how those things have exceeded your expectations or not.

Of course, you can always talk about ways that your spouse has exceeded your expectations. This will help you express appreciation to your spouse for good things, and give your spouse a boost at the same time.

Tags: communication, marriage exercise, expectations