Infidelity Begins Small
Infidelity Begins Long Before the Discovery of the Affair
Infidelity begins long before the discovery of the extra-marital affair. No matter whether one or both of you had an affair, if you are now trying to heal, the cheater will need to adjust his or her thinking and behavior to avoid the temptation to act this way again.
You never really know what someone else is thinking. You can guess, of course, but you never truly know. This is important because it is your own responsibility to create good thinking skills and make good decisions.
Affairs Are a Series of Small [Bad] Decisions
The road to a marital affair involves many decisions, often seemingly tiny ones, along the way.
For example, a coworker asks why you look stressed and you decide to reveal that you had a real blow-out argument with your spouse that morning. A clue like this can easily be pursued by the other person if that person is interested in you.
Sometimes, it takes many little decisions like that to get to the point where you begin to significantly push the limits or boundaries of your marriage commitment. It could possibly develop over years to get to the point of pushing a boundary.
Avoid Affairs by Making the Right Decisions
Whenever you are confronted with small decisions that seem like no big deal, keep in mind the bigger picture. Remember your commitment to the one you love, and make decisions that avoid even the potential of rist. It's too easy to fool ourselves into discounting a risky behavior or a risky relationship.
If your marriage has already experienced an affair it is vital to make a firm commitment to yourself to avoid interactions with the opposite sex. Every time you disregard this caution or explain why it doesn't pertain to you raises the risk for another marital affair.
Marriage Help to Survive Affairs
I offer marriage counseling and marriage retreats as ways to work with me for customized counseling to help you and your spouse survive an affair. I am a marriage-friendly therapist and psychologist; I want your marriage to work, and I will help you do everything in your power to repair your marriage after the affair.
Please call 410-654-1300 or 866-654-1300 to learn more.